Update

So, Christmas was great. Off to Hong Kong tonight. Meeting my friend Liza there, leaving Brian behind for ten whole days. Strange. It'll the longest we've been apart in at least two years. But I get to eat tofu and noodles & visit museums with Liza, so bliss & fun for me.

I'll write more when I get back, I promise. Love to all.

PS: I hate flying.

Mute

No voice today. I had a cold most of last week, feeling *mostly* better, but can't talk, save for a high-pitched wheeze. It was kind of fun at first, playing mute, but it's gotten old.

So - tickets bought for home (for Xmas) & hong kong (for ten days post-Xmas). Two weeks notice given (hurrah!). Work schedule for next semester worked out with advisor.

Apparently I deserve this (folks keep telling me). Still, I feel perpetually guilty & undeserving, as if I'll be exposed as a fraud any moment and sent packing.

I do want an office. Brian and I have been looking at (artists') studio spaces online, and it seems like we could find some sort of shared workspace in SF for not too much ($145 - $200/mo -- albeit in semi-crime ridden areas). It all seems to good to be true. Could everything really be coming up Milhouse?

While I'm here, more bad poetry...

Here's the latest villanelle revision (and how come not one of you pointed out that it was Leda with the swan, and not Europa?)


Leda walked along the wayside,
Wondering at the fair and fowl
Pulling feathers from her hair.

Inside her, Helen, Clytemnestra:
Smooth outside and dark within.
Leda walked along the wayside.

She lies awake upon her mattress.
It’s the smell, that dust she breathes
Pulling feathers from her hair.

Tramping slowly, gently - careful
Should her god-eggs fall and break
Leda walks along the wayside.

Helen grows up white and downy,
Standing on the walls of Troy
Pulling feathers from her hair.

Cursing Zeus, and Aphrodite
Who cast soft eyes to earth one day,
Leda walked along the wayside
Pulling feathers from her hair.

It's been a while

I'm sick -- sore throat & no energy. Slept all day. Too tired to write anything grammatical or interesting. Guilt blogging, really. I think I'm going to quit my jorb and throw myself at the mercy of the world. Feeling guilty that generous parents & patient boyfriend make this all possible. But really. For someone who advocates living as part of a community, I am stubbornly stuck on the idea of independence sometimes.

oof. Gonna go take a bath & eat some toast. Welcome to the 21st century. This is blogging. What hath the internets wrought?